beta test #2

Yesterday I went for my second blood test to find out whether or not our pregnancy was viable. Unfortunately, my levels had continued to decline since Wednesday and the test came back as an official negative. We had lost the baby. I pretty much had zero emotion upon hearing the news, as I knew this would be the outcome. Of course we are both sad and disappointed, but we had been preparing ourselves for the worst.

So IVF did not work for us this time, but it's not the end of the world. It rarely works out on the first try, but we were hoping to be among the lucky few for whom it does. Most couples get more than one chance because they are able to produce enough eggs to freeze the extras for additional transfers. This was not the case in our situation. This was our one and only shot. We know at least one baby stuck, since we were able to get those positive at-home test results. However, the little guy wasn't strong enough and most likely did not continue to grow past the implantation stage.

Trying another IVF is not in our plans for the immediate future. We have other options, which we will start exploring after the holidays. We have a follow up with our doctor on January 12th, so until then we are just going to relax and enjoy the holidays. It's hard not to know the plan God has in store for us. Patience is not a strong point for either one of us. But we have faith that it will work out in the end, somehow.

Moving on.